it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
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