The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
