you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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