Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
