he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
