my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I can't turn off my feet"
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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