boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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