he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
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