yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
not ubering you a puppy
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
