Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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