somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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