love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
We got so high we made milksteak
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
