i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
