And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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