Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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