I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
