I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
