he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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