i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Randomize
