I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
