he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
