tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize