Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
