How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
