I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
