I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Randomize