In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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