Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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