Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
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