i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
