Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.

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(403): you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion. http://tfl.nu/ldji

Replies (16) Good night (6861) Bad night (730)
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(613): View more from Ontario

no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.

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(613): no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/h5lf

Replies (12) Good night (588) Bad night (3319)
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(314): View more from Missouri

The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.

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(314): The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order. http://tfl.nu/ghcj

Replies (11) Good night (911) Bad night (3326)
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(404): View more from Georgia

you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.

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(404 ): you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood. http://tfl.nu/0x0h

Replies (11) Good night (779) Bad night (4847)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?

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(401): I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple? http://tfl.nu/ri0o

Replies (2) Good night (2004) Bad night (1433)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?

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(307): How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots? http://tfl.nu/gvsx

Replies (13) Good night (3727) Bad night (1005)
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(303): View more from Colorado

You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...

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(303): You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike... http://tfl.nu/i5zc

Replies (7) Good night (1024) Bad night (2163)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.

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(920): You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day. http://tfl.nu/y8lp

Replies (10) Good night (2860) Bad night (905)
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(708): View more from Illinois

he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.

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(708): he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay. http://tfl.nu/sfnl

Replies (6) Good night (1289) Bad night (742)
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(347): View more from New York

Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta

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(347): Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta http://tfl.nu/zwtd

Replies (6) Good night (1263) Bad night (537)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.

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(920): I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation. http://tfl.nu/1i3x

Replies (7) Good night (1417) Bad night (516)
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(406): View more from Montana

She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!

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(406): She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT! http://tfl.nu/q2ei

Replies (7) Good night (1540) Bad night (433)
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(647): View more from Ontario

Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm

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(647): Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm http://tfl.nu/f115

Replies (5) Good night (524) Bad night (296)
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(580): View more from Oklahoma

I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.

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(580): I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her. http://tfl.nu/o5ak

Replies (6) Good night (697) Bad night (316)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?

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(412): he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question? http://tfl.nu/r5st

Replies (4) Good night (695) Bad night (413)

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