No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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