stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Michael Bay diarrhea
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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