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He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
