I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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