I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
