We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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