that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
