chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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