He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i tasted like america
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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