hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
