my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
im holly from the hills drunk
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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