Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
