i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Randomize
