Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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