Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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