So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
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Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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