its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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