I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
