i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
