i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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