went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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