She announced her abortion via fbk
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
