so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
