We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
